Quiet evening

First of all, let me say that I am ok. I am fine. It all could have turned out so much worse.

So now that I have that disclaimer out of the way, I am sure that you all are awaiting the news on why I felt the need to make this disclaimer! This weekend I went to the movies and then camping with volunteer friends and took a much needed two day hiatus from the Cradle. I love being here. But it sometimes gets overwhelming and you just need to do something fun. So, as you can see from my pictures, we went to to the only cinema in town and enjoyed the only movie they had playing in English… ECLIPSE! That’s right, ladies and gentlemen! I got to see a Twilight movie in Tanzania! How cool is that!?! They only have two screens here and the other screen always plays a bollywood/hindi movie. I think one day I will watch one just to say that I did. It will be fun.

Anyway, we had a great weekend in the nature of Africa. We were quite tired and dirty and so excited to get back to showers, food, and actual toilets! The company that had arranged our trip was driving us home. We were having a great conversation with some of the men from the company when IT happened. Less than 2 miles from our final destination, an apparently drunk driver pulled out of his lane to pass a dala dala (van taxi) and pulled DIRECTLY into our lane to hit our car head on. Our driver was already going at a slow rate of speed and tried to maneuver us into the shoulder as to avoid collision. The head-on driver swerved back into his lane to avoid hitting us head on, but due to the thick amount of night traffic, did not have enough room to fall back in line and swerved again towards us. And in a matter of 10 seconds, he had T-boned our car—and crashed into the back passenger door where I was sitting. Immediately, I was buzzed. I realized that I had slammed my head into the frame of the car, but nothing else seemed injured. No blood. No broken bones. But I was confused. My two friends with me starting talking to me to make sure I was ok, but for some reason I couldn’t talk. I thought I was answering their questions, but my brain was so jolted that I couldn’t get the words out! But when the fog was lifted from my brain, all I could see was 30-50 Tanzanian men SWARMING our car. Our driver was injured, but he was concerned for us and our safety. He and the other men from the company in the car with us would NOT let us out of the car and insisted that we not move. They were arguing with the people gathered around our car. It was total chaos.

Friends, I am not a scared person. I will walk places by myself and I am not afraid to try new experiences and to put myself out there. But when you have just been in an accident, you are in an unfamiliar country, and you have 50 Tanzanian men talking a mile a minute in Swahili and trying to get to you (and mostly our things) inside the car, its scary! At one point, someone from the outside had gotten one of the passenger doors open and the men inside our car start screaming at the man and reached behind and got the door shut and locked it tight. The men with us insisted that we NOT get out of the car. They were trying to protect us from the throng of people outside, while recovering from the crash themselves. And this all happened in a matter of minutes after the accident. I don’t know where all these Tanzanians came from. But it was pitch black. We were banged up. And had no way of knowing how this was going to play out. I was a little afraid.

But God had a plan that he had put into place a few months ago. When I arrived here, I was introduced to a young man named Almas. He worked for a local taxi company, and had been so punctual and fair with his taxi service, that we started using him for everything! He takes volunteers to the airport, to the market, and to fun activities. He escorts us to the hospital when we have sick babies and stays until treatment is complete, then drives us home. He never asks for more than what he is owed, and if we don’t have money at the moment, he just takes care of us anyway and says that he’ll get money from us later. He is a GOD SEND and in our moment of chaos from the crash, he was there! I called him from inside our crashed vehicle….dazed and confused… and pleaded for him to come find us. All I could really tell him was what road we were on and my approximation to where we might be! And in a miracle that can only be from God, he was there within 5 minutes! He pushed through the crowd to “find his wazungus”. He gathered us up and had a friend who lives RIGHT AT THE ACCIDENT SITE help get us through the crowd. No one bothered us as he got us safely inside his vehicle. He even searched through the wrecked vehicle to make sure that all of our things were intact and that no one had taken any of our stuff. Honestly, I cared more about our safety than our stuff. But this is Almas…. our knight in shining armor!!

In the few minutes it took to get back to campus, I started to vomit. As much as I hate to admit it, I had my first concussion. One of the friends/volunteers who was with me, Eilleen, is a Pediatrician. She and my other friend, Carolyn, were not injured in the accident. Just sore and bruised. Unfortunately, I vomited a few more times that night and Eilleen kept a close watch on me to make sure it was a mild concussion and nothing more. But I can say now that I am fine. I have the biggest knot on my head and feel like a sledge hammer was taken to my brain, but otherwise I am just sore. God REALLY blessed us and kept us relatively safe. It could have turned out so differently. I am very lucky….no… I am very cared for! God is good and had his hand in all of this. We are really ok.

So here are a few pictures from my weekend. Praise God for protecting us. Praise God for bringing Almas into my life. I’m really hungry right now. I think I am going to go try to eat something and bring a little peace to my starving stomach!

Carolyn and Eileen. My camping buddies and later car accident crash survivors!

Perfect

Good afternoon readers! I thought I would start off with the updated picture I promised you of our sweet Happy girl! Just look at that toothless smile! I didn’t even prompt her. She saw me walk in the room and sit down and she cooed for me across the room. So I quickly grabbed my camera and captured this picture. I stripped her down today and her little ribs are no longer poking through. THANK YOU FATHER IN HEAVEN.

I had the privilege of putting her to bed tonight and she cried! Now, I realize that a crying child would not normally be a reason for rejoicing, but when you have a child who is so weak that she ceases to cry, you find her whines and cries to be the most joyous melody. Anyway, here are some more pictures of our beautiful girls. Everyone was wearing pink or cream today. You will see at the end of the pictures our TRIFECTA! Ellie, Witness, and Happy. They are all within 6 weeks old of each other. So cute. Additionally, you will see our sweet “mama” Rahma. My hope is that in her lifetime, we will find a cure for HIV so that she will live long and old enough to be a mama to her own healthy brood. She is so good with the babies. She helped me put Happy to bed tonight and is always such a good helper. I love that girl! I would bring her home with me if I could. But Tanzanian law doesn’t allow. So I will cherish our days like today and enjoy each moment I have with her.

Miriam strikes three poses!
Look at Nancy in that swing. Such a cutie.

Shae-Shae can't resist her snuggles, kisses, and giggles from Happy

Ellie is reminding me that she only loans me out to sick babies. Otherwise, I'm hers!



Isn't this trifecta beautiful??

Oh Star

Heard today around the baby home:

Nanny Grace: "Shae, look! She is is eating." (holds out Happy and her half eaten bowl of baby cereal)

Shae (to Happy): "You just like giving Shae-Shae a little scare don't you? I was so worried about you and now I think you were just trying to play a joke on me. You were getting me all worked up for nothing."

Happy: ***an unsolicited big smile and a sweet giggle***

Nannies: All laughter at Happy's impromptu response to Shae's inquiry.

Shae: (to herself-- quietly thanks GOD for this moment, knowing that only HE is the reason Happy is strong enough to giggle!)

I don't have an updated picture of Happy, but I will post one tomorrow when I take my camera downstairs to capture her sweet little smile. I just wanted to get you guys an update and to THANK YOU for all your prayers, thoughts, and inquiries into Happy's health. I can only say that there is NO reason for her upturn in health other than God. While it is true that we have given her a lot of extra attention, antibiotics, an overload of vitamins, and force feedings, her condition should not have improved so quickly. However, it was literally hours after I publicly asked for prayers that Happy started to make a change.

God cannot always answer our cries with the result that we want. So we must always be diligent and trust in His plan. Happy is still not out of the woods. Therefore, we must still put our faith in the almighty healer and accept what is to come. But for now... and for always.... I will praise Him for hearing OUR prayers and letting us know that he is listening!

I want to make a special "shout-out" to the employees, donors, friends, and neighbors of Joni Beery and the Florida Blood Center @ the Villages/Lady Lake. Your support of our babies here at Cradle of Love is a beautiful surprise to me. I want to personally thank you for believing in this work that I am doing here and showering our babies with your good thoughts, prayers, love, and donations. I couldn't be successful without you!

And to the rest of my friends, church family, and "chosen" family - you already know what a star each of you are to me! Thank you for your continued support. I know that you are all SICK of me telling you how much I love you and appreciate you. But each of you have shown me love in such special ways. This work is as much YOUR mission as it is mine. And I remind people here of that all the time. I love you again. December 10 will come faster than you think... lets party when I get home!

~Shae

Note to self # 7 – Don’t EVER forget that God is God, and I am not. Crisis is an opportunity for me to let go of the things that I so desperately want to control, and allow Abba Father to show me who, what, where, when, and why HE is. “God our father, once again, we bow our heads to pray. You are our Father and our friend, and you hear every word we say.”

Never let this go

I think sharing pictures of our children and life here in Usa River is important. But I must always be careful because I don't want to ever exploit our children for my own benefit. Its important to me that I don't just put up pictures of nameless faces. But rather, I want to show you these children as they are; named, loved, character, personality, struggles and successes. It bothers me when people stroll into our baby home and stay for one hour(or less!) to get the "cute picture with the orphans" but don't take any time to really get on the floor and play with our children or feed our children or whatever. I realize that some of these groups have a limited schedule. But taking video or pictures for your own gain is sad. This happened yesterday and I actually started to cry (I'll admit that I am a little tired these days and kinda' stressed). I love the groups who come in and forget all about the camera for a while and just love on our children. THAT is what we should all do. Pictures are good. But satisfying the human condition is better. I digress...

So, now that I have ranted about pictures and babies... look at the picture of Rosie above! (I know, I know, the irony is not lost on me!!!!). After much effort on the part of her parents, Rosie has FINALLY been able to go home! Adoption can be such a struggle, but when you love your child you just never let it go and you fight for them. To the left is Rose's biological father, who along with his brother and Rose's grandfather, made the difficult decision to allow her to be adopted by her mother and father (center and right). Its so special that so many people love her and worked SO HARD to get the best for her. Anyway, we are so grateful to God that this worked out for everyone. Congratulations Jonathan & Rahema on your new baby girl. I won't write about her anymore because she is all yours to love and to share as you see best!

Misery Business

Pole Jacob!

Our sweet little boy has been enduring walking pneumonia. He had gotten pretty bad and the tears started to flow. Batilda, our wonderful nurse, decided that the best way to treat him would be to open a direct line and get antibiotics directly into his blood stream. The picture below shows the port where she and our volunteer Ashley (a recent nursing graduate) would administer doses of antibiotics. Jacob was a real trooper. He didn't try to pull out the line and none of the other children would mess with it. They would only say "Shaeeee, Shaeeeee, pole! Pole Jacob. " or they would say "owey, Jacob. Jacob sick." (Pole means 'sorry'.)



Luckily, our little Jacob has recovered. No more harsh wheezing. No more fever. No more miserable times. It may seem a little bit of overkill to open access on a child that should be in bed, under a humidifier, oral meds, and tons of vapor rub. But in this situation, where each adult is in charge of 7 or 8 children, even our children with pneumonia won't get the same attention as they would at home. But our children are so resilient! It makes sense why they don't fight things as complicated as IV's. When you are fighting for your life everyday, you cooperate with the things that keep you alive. I don't mean to be dramatic. Its just the honest truth. Would your child run around with a port in his hand and act like nothing was wrong? Something to think about.

And on another side note of misery, please PRAY for our little Happy girl. I am now at the end of week 5 here at Cradle, and I was bothered by the fact that little Happy wasn't getting any bigger. After two days of hemming and hawwing with myself, I finally asked our nurse to weigh her. I had a hunch that Happy wasn't gaining weight. You can image my sad surprise to see that Happy had LOST over 1 kilo which equated to almost 2.5 lbs! We've been struggling for two days to get extra formula and food in her. But she is now refusing some of her food. She goes for tests tomorrow. Pray pray pray for our little Happy. She is over 7 months old and only 9 lbs. WE MUST GET HER WELL!!

Let the flames begin

My throat is on fire.  You all know how much I struggle with allergies and asthma.  Its a constant battle I fight in the states under normal, healthy conditions.  But I am finding that here, now working on week 5 of my 25 week stay, I am uncomfortable.  Luckily, I brought enough pharmaceuticals to get me by.  But I wasn’t expecting to be hitting them so hard, so early!  Who knew that smoke would be drifting into my window 2 times a day? I understood it would be dusty…. but holy man!  So, I thought I would make a list of things I might like to have Stanley bring (if he can!) when he comes in August.  There are more than pharmaceuticals on the list.  And if it doesn’t work out, its no big deal. But since everyone keeps asking, I thought I would create a simple list.

For Babies:  Nappy rash cream, a few cloth nappies, anti-fungal creams, medicine dropper. NO CLOTHES AND NO TOYS PLEASE.

For Shae:  Cough Medicine (adult target brand works great because the stuff I bought here is SOOOO gross)

zyrtec (it makes me sleepy, but is better than the allergy meds I brought- and generic works fine ),

airborne ( I think I have extra in my storage unit…it would be in the red medicine tool box), and

my pink flat iron (Susan and Chad have this at their house.  I know its frivolous, but a little frivolity is nice sometimes!).

Things are going ok here.  I am currently frustrated working in the office.  There is more work to do and no training to do it.  The other volunteers here only had one day with the director before she left for the states, so they were a limited resource and now they have returned home. Can you imagine preparing information for adoptions, running payroll, shopping for an orphanage, answering all visitor questions, organizing volunteers, pick up, paperwork,  and showing them the ropes of an orphanage, telling the staff what they can and should be doing because they are asking your permission to do it, and answering the phones and emails that come in from outside organizations, plus doing immigration paperwork and signing your name to it as an authority to do so? AND ALL WITHOUT TRAINING AND ALL IN THE FIRST WEEK????

Its sometimes tough here.  The culture shock alone could have been overwhelming, much less the added responsibility of running the orphanage. And you all know that I am physically incapable of doing anything half-ass!  So, I will just keep plugging away and make magic happen… like I always do!  

Laters dudes. I am going to take some more dayquil and hope for the best!

~Shae

Keep dreaming upside down

My life is not so different from anyone else's. I mean, can't you relate to these comforts of home? Lets take a pictorial journey together.

I mean, just look at my electrical plug. Adapters and a power switch on the actual plug? You have that, right?


A porcelain toilet? Now that looks familiar, yes? How about the two optioned, push-buttoned flush? Everyone's got that at home! Completely normal.

And since we are on the subject of gadgets and appliances, how about this hot-plate stove? Who needs coils and glasstops when we've got rust and degrees in Celsius?!?!

Have you seen my newest creation in chakula (food- for all you westerners)? Well, its important to make one meal a week that feels like something from home. So here is my mac and cheese. What? You can't read the arabic on my 'cheese in a can'? What's wrong with you people? Everyone knows arabic. You need to sue your school.



And the way that it just mixes so well with the pasta? Scrumptious.



So, lets talk sleep and upkeep. I love how my skin is changing colors, all on its own. I mean, I can scrub and scrub and scrub, and that rich brown color just won't leave the bottom of my feet. Its so cool. I never knew you could tan the heels of your feet by just walking.



My apartment is so well protected by the gate and the guard. Just look out of my window. I'm living like royalty! And speaking of looking out of my window, check out my bed. I bet you wish you had mosquito nets covering you while you sleep!!!




But I have to confess that my favorite things here that TOTALLY remind me of home are the things that we all have lying around the house that come in a bottle....




Ahhhhhhh, just like home.

Note to self# 6 - Its ok to find humor in unfamiliar and uncomfortable things. Because to laugh about it, means that its ok. And my life is more than ok. Keep swinging with the unfamiliar, Shae. You might come to love all that which you thought you were here to change.


Please leave comments below or email me sometime. I love to get messages from home.